by Leo Cardez, Dixon Correctional Facility in Dixon, Illinois There is nothing exactly like living in Hell, but there is something close to it: Jail and Prison. In my Hell, where I lived for most of 2015, there is, as Dante understood, no hope. People think the worst part of being locked up is the loss of freedom. They are wrong. The worst part is the loss of hope and purpose. You wake up every morning realizing your nightmare will continue into your waking hours. The loss you have suffered is permanent. Life will never be the same. In many
Continue ReadingA Collaborative Conversation, Part 1
by Armando R. Gonzalez and Floyd D. Collins, San Quentin State Prison, CA Ok Mr. Collins, the topic is “Building more trust.” Man, where do I begin? I guess first off for me, when I hear “Trust” I really hear vulnerability. When I think about trusting, I feel a mix of feelings, hurt, anxiety, excitement, longing, anger and hope. In my past I believed trust was a sucker’s bet. Today, I see that trust is not a feeling. It’s a choice. A decision that sometimes is made intuitively but often needs to be re-evaluated and remade. This might include communicating
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Volume 27.11/12
Please contact Lisa Lavaysse if you would like to purchase the full PDF or a printed copy of this issue.
Continue ReadingEd Note 27.11/12
Welcome friends to another fabulous issue of The Beat Within. We certainly hope you will enjoy all the wonderful submissions in this latest issue, there is so much good work being produced by our young workshop participants, as well as by our friends who take it upon themselves to reach out from around the state, inside and outside of the system. Overall, the work has been quite busy as we embrace 2022, but incredibly rewarding, as we continue to learn so much from you writers and artists who share your truths, your story, as you tackle our writing prompts. We
Continue ReadingSpider-Man and Batman
by YPC I would rather have Spider-Man because he’s not as ruthless as Batman. I would rather have Batman on the outside and Spider-Man on the inside. I know Batman has the most money, but that doesn’t really define people. If I had the personality of Spider-Man, I would be more welcoming to others unlike Batman. If I had to choose which Spider-Man I could be it would probably be Miles Morales because we have a lot in common. If I had to choose the Batman suit it would be the all black one, and not the gray, black, and
Continue ReadingHere Goes Nothing
by AG, Sacramento Heartless, I can be, why?Let’s see, but I ask you not to judge meSo, here goes nothingI may be all over the place with thisSo just bear with meSo my life is a messed up messAnd yeah, it’s sad, but I say that with my chestMy heart is broken, yes, I write and speak about the same stuffSo if you wonder why, take a good guessI’ve been through it all, foster homes…While I’m in trouble, yet watching the blood kids have a ballI’m kind of like Humpty Dumpty, and had a great fallI never got back up,
Continue ReadingHeartless Vs. Having Heart
by Curry, San Francisco We all know what having a heart means, and the dictionary defines heartless as, “displaying a complete lack of feeling, emotion, concern, or consideration.” I feel like I am a very loyal, loving, and caring person. I try my best to look out for people whenever I can. I’m the type of person to give a friend the shirt off of my back if they are in need. I am also a person who is forgiving of a lot of minor things. I often tend to try to unsee small things or not let them get to
Continue ReadingLast Night I Cried
by Elton Kelley, San Quentin State Prison, CA Seldom during my time of incarceration have I found anything of significant beauty. I understand it’s prison, after all, and beauty is not normally to be associated and certainly is not one of the prison’s design criterion. A couple of years ago I spotted some deer grazing on the hill situated on the northwest end of San Quentin Peninsula where California’s oldest prison is located. The hilltop is visible from most vantage points within the facility so nearly anyone interested can catch a peek of whatever is going on up there. On
Continue ReadingDrugs Really Messed Me Up
by Jesse Ayers, San Quentin State Prison, CA It took years for me to slowly recover. I used to be an emotional zombie, burnt the eff out! It really was (is) sad. I have been sober almost eight years now! This St. Patrick’s Day will be eight years clean! The purpose of me writing this to The Beat Within. My only purpose to my writing to The Beat Within, is to inspire someone else who might be going through the same thing. Today I understand the neuropathic process of releasing endorphins inside the brain. It’s a lot like a MSD
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Volume 27.09/10
Please contact Lisa Lavaysse if you would like to purchase the full PDF or a printed copy of this issue.
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