Category: The Beat Without

by Downer Guns played a detrimental part in my life because for a long time, that was my only understanding on how to deal with my issues and problems that I encounter on the streets. Guns were always perpetuated, as “that’s how you handle business”. This ideology ultimately led me to commit murder in gang violence because I wanted to be respected, accepted, and powerful. That ‘genius’ way of thinking cost me seventeen years and counting, of my life at the age of fteen. My response to the popular pro-gun expression of “guns don’t kill people, people kill people” is

by Darrell McGreggor  My name is Darrell McGreggor. I am forty-eight years old and I am an ex-gang member. When I was fourteen years old, I moved into my father’s home and I became troublesome— most of which was internal. I was headstrong and did whatever I wanted to do. I started hanging with the wrong crowd of people. I became mischievous and looking for love in the wrong places. At age sixteen, I joined a gang for acceptance and to be known. I wanted people to fear me. At the same time, I wanted my former peers to respect me.

by Darrell McGreggor My name is Darrell McGreggor. I am forty-eight years old and I am an ex-gang member. When I was fourteen years old, I moved into my father’s home and I became troublesome— most of which was internal. I was headstrong and did whatever I wanted to do. I started hanging with the wrong crowd of people. I became mischievous and looking for love in the wrong places. At age sixteen, I joined a gang for acceptance and to be known. I wanted people to fear me. At the same time, I wanted my former peers to respect

by Giggs I remember telling myself I would never come back, I kept my word for the next seven years. It didn’t take too long for the fog to lift up out of my head, wanting back all I had and realizing how much I should’ve been grateful for a bit late… I stressed for the longest how much I just wanted to get back to how and where I was, not materialistically or tangibly. Just me, the person I had become, learning to love, to live. To embrace life as it comes. But the more it is the more I

by Phong Dang BANG, BANG, BANG!!!  With no regard for human life I recklessly shot four times into a group of my rivals and Phung Thanh Nguyen is lying bloody on the floor. I wake up startled as the reality of what I have done hit me! I open my eyes and I’m back in my tiny cell sweating from the nightmare that I had caused.  Serving twenty-three years into my incarceration I try to gain insight into why I became this monster. And I start to reflect… I was born on January 24, 1975, in Saigon, the capitol of Vietnam. 

by Eddie “Edito” DeWeaver Witnessing my father experience negative contact with law enforcement helped to form the false belief system of a fourteen- year-old, “that nothing I could do would change the world.” At that time, I had no idea how far I was away from the truth. Now sitting in this prison cell, I can say that I did change the world…for the bad. Fortunately, my story continues to get better, as I began to rst take responsibility for my past, and also, to believe in my power to impact the future…for the good. When it comes to voting,

by Dortell Williams Some time ago, I got a call to the dentist’s of ce. I wasn’t expecting a call; I had no problems or complaints. But when staff calls, you know you gotta go check it out. So I went in there and there they were: the dentist and two assistants. Nothing unusual about that. The odd thing was that they were all smiling- and looking at me! Now you know that’s weird, at least on this side of the wall. To be polite, I smiled likewise. The shorter nurse with glasses said I looked confused, but maintained her

by Xiomara Gonzalez A person doesn’t realize that no matter what it is that they’re going through, “this too shall pass.” I didn’t see things this way for a long time. That is, until one time at about three in the morning, I woke up to a noise I’ve never heard before. I listened and realized someone somewhere nearby was crying. This cry was that of a wounded animal. It sounded so sad, my heart sank and broke into a million little pieces. She didn’t know this, but for the whole time she cried, I sat there silently and just

by Michael Webb Back in the early 1970’s I watched my favorite TV show Emergency. As a child I dreamed of becoming a fireman just like the firemen on Emergency. Every time the bell would ring and the big red shining engine fifty-one would leave the station on a run, I would imitate it with my firetruck. Also, I pictured myself going to rescue a stranded person or putting out a fire. As I grew older the innocence I once had as a child became lost. That was when my neighborhood became heavenly infested with drug dealers and violent gang

by Dortell Williams As I sat in my concrete cage, looking at the massive failure I’ve made of my life, I’ve wondered: “What is the secret to success?” What does it take to be successful? Over time, I came to recognize that this is where history comes into play. I’m not talking about going back centuries, though you can if you want. But just recent history is good enough. For instance, to see how failure occurs, all I needed was to look at myself: Hanging with the wrong crowd, not listening to sound advice, being sel sh and greedy. All