Category: The Beat Without

by Frederick Mason, USP Tucson in Tucson, AZ Today, November 24th, I woke up in my cell, in B2 unit USP Tucson, at about 7am as I heard the breakfast trays coming. I got up, reminded that just yesterday, November 23rd, that 18 inmates in B2 tested positive for the COVID-19 virus and had to be moved to B1 along with their property, except their mattresses. In exchange B1 sent 30 inmates who had not tested positive into B2, since the remaining 75 of us had yet to test positive. Dorms hold up to 128 inmates. Once all the switches

by Keith Erickson, Pleasant Valley State Prison in Coalinga, CA There was this boy. He had been harmed as just a child by the very ones that were supposed to love and protect him. They had failed him in more ways than you can imagine. He was, like many of the men that now fill these prison walls of despair and disdain, broken before he ever stood a chance. If you knew his past, their past, you would see the world around you with deeper compassion than you ever thought possible. Their stories, our stories are real.  The tattooed faces,

by Dortell Williams, California State Prison, Los Angeles County in Lancaster, CA I supposed that it is rare for a man cured of toxic masculinity to admit that he was the domestic enemy of the house. Especially when domestic violence is all too common in today’s society, and yet now I speak out against it. I wish I could say that I evolved to a place where I was mature enough to just get it without having ever harmed a soul. But regretfully, I didn’t fully understand until after I had committed grave harm, falling as low as one can

by Richie F. Angulo, Avenal State Prison in Avenal, CA When you were growing up, who was our worst enemy? Was it the neighborhood kid or the school yard bully? As I reflect on my life, I remember very well that I was always hiding from my worst enemy. It didn’t matter if I was in school, playing baseball on the field, or at the store with my parents, my worst enemy had a way of keeping me on my toes. I was afraid, always on the move. I needed to be one step ahead of him. So you’re probably

by Charles Reece,  San Quentin State Prison, CA April 21st, 2020 at 9am I was transported to Marin General Hospital for my long overdue prostate surgery that I had been waiting on for twenty-two months. I should have been given the surgery no later than one month after discovery of the prostate cancer in June of 2018. A prisoner is never transported to outside medical facilities more than thirty minutes before their appointment for security reasons, therefore my surgery should have taken place no later than 10am but didn’t. The two guards and I arrived at the hospital five minutes

by Floyd D. Collins, San Quentin State Prison, CA So what exactly is freedom? Being a lifer with a possibility of parole you would think I would say freedom is outside these walls, on the other side of this gate. Well, I do feel this is only a part of freedom. For me freedom is being my authentic self. What this means is being the person God created me to be. Having a strong and clear peace of mind is freedom. Now I know how to have a good day, even when everything and everyone may feel it’s bad. I

by Raul Higgins, San Quentin State Prison, CA In the midst of the infirmities and traumatic memories of this deadly Coronavirus pandemic, it continues to linger on in the cells of San Quentin. However, with watchful eyes and cautious paranoia, it’s not an option to let my guard down, either. With the power of prayer and the courageous pillars of our communities it inhales a natural breath of resilience.  Then it exhales the most power-fullest currency in prison-HOPE! A hope that’s resuscitated my second wind. Drifting through a wind-tunnel of looming dark shadows and haunting fears that have rattled my

by Keith Erickson, Pleasant Valley State Prison in Coalinga, CA As a child, I never imagined that my favorite place in the world, my world, would be a park bench in a California State Prison. I find the most serene moments being suspended in time, right there adjacent to the inmate soccer field.  It’s a place that I have walked by thousands of times over without as much as a second glance. A place where taking a moment to just sit and relax my legs, would require me pausing for a period of time, disrupting my doing absolutely nothing at

by William Curl, SATF in Corcoran, CA …I’m on my twenty sixth year of incarceration. I’m no longer the immature kid who had no idea how to properly process the emotional trauma from my childhood. I’m sure none of you woke up one morning and said, “Today I’m goin’ to join a gang or become a criminal.” That’s not how it works. It’s a process that starts with the way we were raised, be it household, environment, some traumatic experience in our childhood caused us to embrace an antisocial way of thinking.  It’s all about perspective. The way we perceive

by Torrey Thomas, San Quentin State Prison, CA I am doing great and as always thank you for giving all incarcerated people a chance to have our voices heard on such an amazing platform. As I write this letter on April 5th, I am currently in “the Hole”. I’m waiting on my transfer that should happen in a couple more days.  As I am aware all inmates in San Quentin who are age 25 and under will leave and go to a prison called Valley State. This is because of a program called Youth Offender Program (YOP). So far I’m