Category: The Beat Without

by Jaymone K. Lewis, otosi Correctional Center in Mineral Point, Missouri What thoughts are enveloping your conscious at this moment? Think beyond the words that you are consciously reading right now and really try to grasp the deepest thoughts possible. What drew your mind to want to look into the thoughts of others? Was it boredom? Curiosity about other forms of human Nature? Or did you want to trade shoes with someone else temporarily and have any relevance to yours. I asked those questions to get your brain running while also opening a door to deeper thinking. Why? Because life

by Harry C.Goodall Jr., San Quentin State Prison, CA There are times that our fear can be just as a big a barrier as a brick wall. This real life issue presents itself when it comes for us recovering from trauma. When I think of all the things that would make me grown I was lost. When I was younger, parts of me that thought if I could hold my liquor, I could be grown. There was even a part of me that thought if only I had money I would have power and respect. That money could buy any

by Jesse Ayers, San Quentin State Prison, CA I am 42 years old, my birthday is May 24th, I was first arrested at the age of six years old. I didn’t go inside Juvenile Hall until I was fourteen. Between 6-14 I was in police stations, probation courts, community service, “scared straight” program where we took a tour of Corcoran State Prison (back in 1990). My dad had been to prison, my Uncle was on B-yard in Corcoran, during my “tour” to scare me straight. There was no “tactic” to trick me into being a “good kid.” No one could

by Terkesha Lane, Federal Detention Center in Miami, Florida This is not a letter due to my current circumstances of being in prison. I have always felt this way about my children. Year after year, the older they became, I fell more in love with them. Their personalities, different but interesting moods, little quirks, the craziness (which I’m sure came from me) just the small things most people would not notice, like how they change when they are sleepy, different study habits, the educational subjects each of them liked or disliked, even how they arranged their clothing closet.  Yes, I

by Chad Fitzpatrick, Correctional Facility in Moose Lake, Minnesota I recently watched a movie on T.V called “Freedom Writers.” It’s about a teacher who encourages her sophomore English class who many are from the inner-city and are gang members to write in a journal every day. It didn’t matter what it was they wrote or how much they wrote as long as they wrote in it every day. They would not be graded on it nor would they be read unless they wanted her to read them. Every time I see that movie it inspires me more to keep on

by Ray Sanchez Jr., Mule Creek State Prison in Ione, CA Not so long ago, a friend of mine earned his parole. I say “earned” because he did not just sit and wait for his time to run out, he actively sought to change himself and enrolled in activities that not only helped to shorten his sentence, but also improve his life.  He did not begin his life, “working hard”, or with a will to “give it back,” as Hank Aaron admonishes us to do. Quite the opposite. He was a young black male, and he was exposed to a

by Efren Bullard Prison Yard in Centinela State Prison I found that quote and thought it would be nice to share it with some people who could really use something different in their lives.  We all have said, “I wish I could go back and do this or that, or relive my life?” Time and life doesn’t work like that. We can never go back and change what has been done. So, when you make the choice to rob someone what you are doing is forever changing that person’s life and your life forever. When you make the choice to

by Leo Cardez, Correctional Facility in Dixon, Illinois Why it is so important as inmates to reclaim our joy, especially now, post 2020. As prisoners, the holiday season can be an especially difficult time of year. We are shaken from our self-induced delusion of contentment to the harsh reality of our forced separation from our loved ones. As if that wasn’t enough to unmoor us…COVID-19.  The epidemic has been devastating to the inmate community in ways seen and unseen. Beyond the unnecessary suffering, fear, and deaths are various underlying side-effects including a slow mental and spiritual deterioration of our shadow

by Samuel “Shady” Cruz, Centinela State Prison in Imperial, CA My turning point in becoming sober came in 2016 when I almost lost the 2 mothers of my kids one in an accidental overdose with pain pills, the other same thing. I’ll be truthful with you; the first one Josephine is the one who our son Rudy died in 2012 and as mother she has taken it truly hard and I do understand. If it wasn’t for our daughter coming home early and noticing her mom’s breathing was not quite the same as usual and her face blue and not

by Noel Rodriguez, Calipatria State Prison in Calipatria, CA I grew up in Watts, South Central, Los Angeles, CA., where we were poor. I migrated from Mexico. We were homeless. We would sometimes live in a car- father, mother, brother and myself. We spent about ten years living and renting a room in some family’s home. While my father worked hard to provide for us, my mother would take us dumpster diving for aluminum or bottles (glass) to sell to the recycling company. We would use that money to eat and pay rent. It was not a lot of money