by LH, Sacramento
“Happy holidays,” they say
Nothing seems happy when you are far away
I take the time out of my day to let you know that
I own up to my mistakes.
Kings and queens in a castle like a game of speed
Running out of time, damn I wish I had my team
My mom, the greatest person, but damn, her criticism is mean
I know she means well so I don’t blame her, I blame me
If only I would have chosen a different route
I would be with my king in a castle all alone
Wondering why his mommy can’t be,
Be with him, be the queen that I once longed to be
I cry at night not knowing how broken my life may be
Dancing and singing to let the pain melt
Don’t you see a fake face for all to see
Hold my head high because I know I’m meant to be free
Living and loving my king
My one and true love trying to fight
Trying to ride out this storm at sea
I have taken away time to find the real me
How long how many days how much time do I really need
To find who I once used to be
The queen of all bees
Money, love, and sorrows
Brought me to a place I never dreamed
Hoping to be back in your life once again
My king, my reason to be me
No one feels my pain, a prisoner by my mind
A prisoner doing time, I never committed any crime
I cry at night not knowing why
I told you the truth and you still thought I lied
Fighting my demons fighting what’s deep inside
Lord, O lord I wonder why
Why me? Why this hand of cards I was dealt
To live my life?
Do I keep on going or do I die?
A future’s what I make it but what is it
If I just keep doing time
I love my king my Harlem knight, the best thing
That happened over time
Nine months in, two years out
What a beautiful time, let him grow, let him shine
Love you baby, it’s your mom
See you on the other side