It’s our anniversary month! Later this month we will embrace our 26th year of service and counting! Hard to believe we launched The Beat Within so long ago… What a beautiful journey, full of incredible friends, colleagues, partners and allies that have embraced The Beat yesterday, today and we are sure more so moving forward!
We welcome you loyal readers back to another double issue, 27.35/36, of the one and only The Beat Within. And as our friend OT says, “the only magazine keeping it one thousand with you readers and writers and is the only publication putting out a double issue every other week!” So very true. Lets keep this moving and pass the keyboard to our friend, OT…
This is OT back again to touch on the subject, burning bridges, which many of you wrote about. I was very impressed with many of your thoughts and ideas and I want to jump in share my definition of burning a bridge too.
To me, when the reference is made of burning a bridge. It’s not about somebody that did you wrong, it’s about somebody you did wrong. I know that many of us rather talk about everybody that did us wrong, but guess, no one is perfect and we all make mistakes. If you’re locked up and reading this, you could be innocent from your crime, but you know that at one point in your life you’ve done something that wasn’t nice. You’ve hurt someone’s feelings, probably somebody that didn’t even deserve to receive that pain from you.
You’ve probably hurt someone physically, mentally or emotionally or even economically, right? For example, have you ever borrowed money and never paid it back? Hey it happens. No matter how many excuses you can make and think of, you still did wrong. You didn’t come through for that person like they came through for you when you needed it. You just have to be willing to admit your faults.
For those of you that are free and reading this, you know you have a story where you probably acted out of character, or you too have done things that have hurt someone. Let me repeat this, no one is perfect. So before you say you never did, or haven’t, can you dig deeper? Whether it’s a comment on social media, making fun of a “different” person, making sarcastic jokes knowing deep inside your heart that you’re saying it; we all make mistakes. Just some of us get caught and some of us don’t.
If you do get caught, that’s a blessing, because going through the consequences of what you did will help you learn. If you don’t get caught you never learn anything, until you do, but the sad part is many don’t ever get caught, unless you get caught on camera, or someone points it out to you.
So think about how many slick ones are out there that never get caught. This is what trips me out about social media, as an example. People go viral either for, doing something good, doing something funny/stupid, or for doing something mean. Cameras are recording our surroundings in all directions. No one’s getting away with anything now.
People love to post about the time that the waiter acted like a jerk. People love to record when someone insults them. People love to record anything negative about someone else, because it’s easy to judge other people. Judging someone else is a lot better than judging ourselves. We all have an opinion. I get it. We all want to be heard.
But don’t throw stones if you live in a glass house. People go as far as plan ahead and create a scenario. People want recognition, the most “likes….” hey I get it, you need content for your internet page. You need to keep people interested. But you can’ t judge people off of one mistake. If that was the case no one would like each other and this world would be more of a mess than it already is.
People are way too sensitive for constructive criticism, or advice, because the person you feel that is giving it to you doesn’t understand you. You’re absolutely wrong. The person that’s giving you that advice and pointing out your defects, and faults, is trying to give you some game. Matter of fact, they just pointed out your weakness, therefore giving you the opportunity to better yourself, so you can in return make better decisions, have a better attitude towards life, show some appreciation for the things that you have instead of constantly thinking about the things you don’t have.
We’ve all have had people in our lives that at some point have told us that we are doing the wrong thing, and all we did was laugh at them, or yell at them, or even cuss them out and say, “You don’t understand me.”
Mistakes are made every day, whether you like to admit it or not. For those of you locked up, you have the time to think about what you did, so we expect more out of you than those in the free world. You have no excuses. But I get it. The American dream that we’re all chasing, working 9 to 5 or 6-12pm doesn’t allows us to reflect on everything we did today, or who we’ve hurt, or who we’ve insulted.
It doesn’t allow those in the free world to even think about the stuff they did, because they are so worried about putting food on the table, paying bills, taking care of the baby, making sure the kids are at school on time.
But let me tell y’all something. Those are petty excuses, because you sure have time to see who went viral, or if (entertainer) Drake is going to get back with Rihanna, or if your favorite sports team is going to win tonight, or if your favorite artist is going to drop a new track, or watch the news about whatever entices your interest.
You know where your interest should be at but you ignore it. You know you need to be a better brother, sister, father, mother, student, neighbor, but most importantly, a better example for your family, because you are wearing a last name that you need to put some pride in, but also a better leader for those around you, and in your community. Don’t be afraid to set the tone. Unfortunately, we tend to sell ourselves short, and we look at those below us, and we say “Well I’m doing better than them.”
Recently, I was called a deadbeat dad and deadbeat brother from someone I love. I understand their anger and frustration. I know what I did to put myself here. I chose the streets over my whole family. This was the mistake I made. We all make mistakes. I know I can’t rewind the clock but I do my best to be there for those I love. I can’t say that what this person said, I won’t tell y’all who it is, because I don’t like talking about people, didn’t hurt, or didn’t make me mad because there is some kind of truth to it. But there is a difference between me and that person, or many other people, is that I don’t run from my truth.
I share my truth with y’all because this is real life. Life doesn’t come with a manual. We don’t know how to act in certain situations, how to be that good parent, how to be that good brother/sister, son/daughter, or even that good member of society. The community is us. We have the power to make the changes if we decide to change ourselves. If you want change in your life, if you want change in your community, it has to start with you first. Be that leader not a follower.
Critique yourself hard. When someone points something out about you don’t ignore them. That’s game that they’re giving you. How to be a better you. They don’t teach that in school. Life teaches you that. For those locked up, you have the upper hand because your circumstances allow you to learn that by using your time wisely and reflecting on your actions, damn near every day. So before you think about who burned that bridge with you, you need to start thinking how many times you’ve let down those you that you love and those that love you down, and the bridges you’ve burned.
Yes, we’ve all burned bridges. Burning bridge means you are messing up a good relationship with someone who was trying to help you, because that’s what bridges do, they help you get to the other side. I’ve burned plenty of bridges with friends, family, my kids, co-workers, teachers, you name it, even Dave (at The Beat), and they’ve all forgiven me. It seems only right that I turn around and do the same to those that burn that bridge with me. No one is perfect, so before you point the finger at someone, remember that it could be someone you love. It takes a lot of work to build bridge, it doesn’t take much to burn it down. Yet, in case you accidentally do, you better roll up your sleeves. You got a lot of work to do to reconstruct it. Don’t be lazy!
One love to everybody going through the struggle. OT is signing out with the utmost love and respect.
Thank you OT for your interpretation of the latest Beat prompt, burning bridges. Now we certainly hope you will enjoy this latest magazine full of amazing writing and art, which we know will inspire, teach and hopefully give you some hope. It is such an honor to work with you all, We truly appreciate the role you play in making this amazing magazine the success it is today, especially as we approach our latest milestone, 6 years. Peace and respect.