by Chaser, San Quentin State Prison, CA
“It’s easier to fool people than to convince them that they’ve been fooled.” -Samuel Clemens aka Mark Twain
It’s easier to fool people then to convince them they have been fooled. This sounds like me as a teenager, specifically when it came to addiction. I was a drug addict and nobody could tell me anything. The biggest problem was I didn’t think I was a drug addict. I regulated my use (sometimes) and I knew older homeboys who were way worse.
From the age of 12 I was drinking. At 13 I started smoking bud. Then by 14 and 15 I was on ecstasy, coke, crystal, shrooms, LSD, and pills. I would do any drug to alter my state. I didn’t want to be sober and above all I didn’t want to feel. I stayed in a perpetual numbness ‘till age 19 when I came to prison. Even that didn’t stop me, just slowed me down.
So many people saw me messed up and told me to quit. I didn’t listen. I thought I was smarter than them and they didn’t know. I was being fooled and no one could convince me of it. I thought I was in on a secret. How to live my life the best way was to be high. That high cost of living caught up to me and I ended up in prison for making a terrible decision, while drunk. If only I knew then what I knew now.