by JJEM Youth Services Center, San Mateo, CA
People take life for granted and when they do, there is always somehow consequences. People who are barely joining the journey of my story welcome and enjoy the ride.
Yeah, I witnessed a lot of violence throughout my life. My dumbass father always left bottles of beer lying anywhere around my home and my one-year-old self would stumble upon it and start drinking it. Then eventually I’ll be a damn one-year-old drunk, but yeah forget that. When my father left, I had to be a parent and a brother to my siblings, but I’ll talk about that later.
If y’all are up to date with this story, you would know I started writing after my mom was hit by a car and the person driving was intoxicated. Last time I said that they took my pencil away. (FYI, I got my pencil back) and got a rubber pencil. I said they also took a part of me away to when they took my pencil. I hated when they took my pencil away because they took away the ability to write in my journal.
They took my damn freedom away from me. Writing has always been there for me whenever I needed it. Something to relieve some stress. I’ve been writing for a long time. When I write things in my journal, I mostly kind of talk to myself, which makes me feel great afterwards. Writing gives me awareness, that’s why I do a lot of writing.
Also, I said last time, that writing makes me feel like a free person. It helps me clear my mind. I have much more clarity. It doesn’t make me feel lost because writing helps me go step-by-step to help me find what I need. It makes me happy, and it makes me feel like me, not some person hiding under a mask.
People who write probably understand how I feel. Y’all might understand, but people who write clearly understand and people who write understand that your pencil or pen is your friend, and that friend will help you whenever you need it, like help you to find yourself. Help you to find peace.
Help you to express how you feel, without being judged, and help you find clarity.