Greetings! Here we are in the middle of March, time is surely flying by! I certainly hope everyone out there who is reading this editorial note is doing well? We can’t thank you enough for your time and work as writers and readers of this amazing one of a kind publication, The Beat Within.
One thing we are super excited about is our return to San Quentin. At this point, we are good to go to connect with our writers and friends, whom we have not seen or embraced in over 2 years, thanks to this pandemic. The loyalty and commitment during the pandemic by our friends in SQ has been amazing. The letters, the updates, the submissions have been incredibly touching and empowering. We are certain this next chapter will be amazing. It has been too long.
This latest issue is packed full of solid writings, we can’t wait for you to dive into this issue which holds plenty of wisdom, art and thoughtful stories for all of us readers. Before we begin flipping through the pages, we encourage you to take a moment to hear our dear colleague, OT, who is back this week sharing his thoughts in this editorial. OT!
I would like to welcome you readers back to another double dose edition of the one and only The Beat Within. This is the only magazine keeping it one thousand with all its readers and writers within our community. As you know, this is OT reporting live to you from the sizzling hot country of Nicaragua in Central America. That’s right folks temperatures are pushing close to 100, humidity is at an all-time high, have to get some fresh lemonade!
This week I want to go ahead and use my personal experiences to give you a glimpse that the struggle is real. The struggle doesn’t stop even when you’re not locked up, matter of fact, if you find yourself in juvie, fighting a case, serving a prison sentence, or you find yourself free, dealing with work, going to school, tryin to put food on the table, this life was never supposed to be easy for anybody.
See it doesn’t matter what background you’re from, whether you grew up by street politics, or stayed away from that, but still manage to put yourself in a situation that you don’t like, that means that you were already struggling before you got yourself in this predicament. You were struggling with yourself, trying to do right, maybe doing wrong. You were possibly struggling with the relationships with your loved ones – immediate family, your mom, your dad, your aunt, your girl/boyfriend.
See, we all have problems. Problems don’t just magically go away. Even worse, when we try to self-medicate and turn to alcohol, drugs, syrup, whatever your cup of tea may be, we start to lose ourselves, and a big part of who we are, and who we’re trying to become.
Since, we’re born, we grow up learning new things. We learn how to crawl, from crawling, to walking from walking to running around everywhere we go. Then as we get older, you learn how to read and write in school, how to wake up early, get ready all on your own. Some of us have to fend for ourselves and learn how to cook, or we have to hustle to make money so we can eat the things we want to eat. You get my drift? Life is a never-ending lifelong lesson that we never stop learning, and what I’ve learned now that I’m close to 37 years old, (Wow, seems like I’m old as heck!) is that life is a cycle and sometimes the same problems repeat themselves, and you have to be prepared to know how to deal with them.
Success is like a never-ending story, which we all try to narrate on our own because we define success in so many different ways. We usually relate success with how much money we have in our bank account or stashed up in a shoe box in our closet. Forgetting that success is really about having a positive mind-frame, and positive attitude with everything you do.
See, money is a necessity. I’m not going to argue with anyone about that. Money is needed to live. Money is needed to pay bills, put food on your table and put clothes on your back. Money is needed to be invested so you can make money back, but success is about being the best version of yourself that you can possibly be.
I’ll be the first to tell you that I’ve done many things that I ain’t proud of. Somethings I chose to do in life, I did for the thrill of it. I’d be the first to admit that growing up I was infatuated with the street life, and the power that it brought. It was never about the fame, but the money, respect and power felt great. But as I got older and started maturing you start to realize that money doesn’t resolve all of your problems. Yes, it does help you purchase the things you need, but if you don’t change your mind-set, you will never find success.
Violence doesn’t resolve problems, matter of fact it creates more. Abusing drugs and alcohol also just creates more problems, and the fact of the matter is problems are meant to be resolved. There is a solution to every single problem in life, but the solution starts with the way you approach life. If you approach life with negativity, and expect to find positive results, you are already thinking wrong. You’re already setting yourself up for failure.
For example, for me. I sometimes tend to think that I’m still doing time. Sometimes I feel like I wake up every day and I’m being punished for all the negative things I’ve done in my life, because I wake up in an estranged country every day, far away from my daughters, far away from my mom, my grandma, my nephews, my nieces, my sisters, who are all in California. Everything that I love and everything that I stand for, which is family, is almost right beyond my reach.
At the same time, I have to be grateful, because being so far away from my family has allowed me to take on a more important role, and I also have to put in more effort in maintaining a relationship with them. When they need someone to talk to I’m the person they can call. When they need to vent about life, or whatever seems to be stressing them out I to listen to their problems, their words, their thoughts, their feelings, and respect their opinions about life. Life is all about having perspective. I don’t’ have to agree with their opinions and beliefs, but I do have to respect how they perceive life through their eyes because life is different for all of us.
My family is not perfect, we fight, and argue all the time. They are hardheaded, and I’m hard headed too. We are all stubborn human beings. I want them to see the world through my eyes. I want them to appreciate each other more. They all live close to each other and all they do is bicker and argue for the smallest things. They never see eye to eye, and I tell them, hey that’s okay. We’re family. We love each other. We don’t have to see eye to eye on everything. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions and beliefs, but even if we have different beliefs, it doesn’t mean we should stop loving each other.
I love basketball you love baseball. I like watching documentaries you like watching scary movies. We are different and that’s okay, but different only because our hobbies and our interests are different. But we all bleed the same. We all cry the same tears. In this world it’s okay to be different and still respect people for who they are. We all have to accept each other for who we are. Be yourself. Don’t be afraid.
I read your writing and sometimes I read complaints that no one has written you a letter. But how many letters have you written? When your friends were locked up were you writing them too? Maybe yes or no, but my point is there is no obligation. When you do things out of the goodness of your heart, you shouldn’t expect anything in return.
We shouldn’t get trophies, awards, or recognition for doing the right things in life. You do it, because it’s the right thing to do. So when you try to do right, when you make an honest effort to do things in a positive way, positive things will come back to you.
That’s the real reward. Someone will help you when you least expect it, because at one point in your life, you’ve helped someone out. You lead by example. So, for all of you that want to see change in your lives, in your communities, in your hood, in your city in this world in general, let’s stop pinpointing fingers and have some accountability.
Be a leader, not a follower. Don’t be afraid to stand up for what is right. You just need to be truly dedicated to making a difference, without expecting something in return.
One love to everybody going through the struggle, make sure you tell your loved ones how much you love them. OT is signing out and The Beat keeps going…
Thank you, OT, for your truth, your love, your empowering words. We are grateful to having you in our life. You are truly an inspiration to many. Thank you Beat readers for your continued support. Enjoy this latest issue. Please do not hesitate to stay in touch with us. We love hearing from all of you when you have the time. Thank you, every single one of you, for making The Beat Within the success that it is. Until the next issue…