by Mesro Coles El, San Quentin State Prison in San Quentin, CA
When I hear the phrase “eye on the prize” I think about staying focused on goals. My primary goal now is parole. There are lots of things that keep us away from our goals, including ourselves. I know I have kept myself from my goals repeatedly by behaving in a way that was averse to my goal. Beware of these behaviors!
I believe my greatest obstacle is me. I have no harsher critic than myself. I have been the one to tell me I am not worth the effort to reach for the things in life that are good, the things that make life sweet. Once, I had no prize, so I climbed onto a bridge and let myself fall into the American River in Rancho Cordova, CA. No one honked to stop me climbing over the fence. No one flinched that I was gone for three days because I was walking back from wherever I washed up on shore. People were actually mad at me for not answering my phone that was destroyed by my fall. Most of the people I know don’t even know this about me and the rest didn’t care.
That would have been getting in the way of myself, keeping my eye off the prize, in the worst way if I succeeded in dying that day. I have always been the reason my eye leaves the prize. I have allowed circumstances to detract and distract me. I have always aloud other people’s opinions to stop my progress. I had to come to a point where my goals became important, that my life had value.
I believe the best way to stay focus on a goal is to know that goal has value. That your goal has meaning. You deserve to achieve your goals and your goals will lead you to greater goals that you deserve to achieve as well. Keep your eye on the prize!