Another week, another Beat, and the following editorial note which was written by our old friend and now former colleague Julia. Unfortunately, Julia wrote the following editorial for Beat issue 15.23, particularly, because she wanted to address the 15.23 topic that delved into Gender roles. Somehow, this editor misplaced her note, and luckily, we just found it again. And, with that said, we present her words to you Beat readers in issue 15.26. Better late than never!

By way of background, for three years, Julia ,stepped up huge each and every week as a facilitator in our weekly workshops in Alameda County. She not only conducted fabulous workshops, she also edited and responded to her units. Julia was very reliable, and is very missed today, though we are very happy for her, given she is going to graduate school on the east coast to further her work as a social worker/advocate. With that said, lets give Julia the floor!

Hey Beat writers and readers! I’d like to start by saying what a great time I’ve had both living in the Bay Area and working with The Beat these past three years. During this time, I’ve had the pleasure of facilitating workshops in Alameda (shout outs to units 8 and 9) every Tuesday night. I’ve learned so much from all of the writers and staff there. Believe it or not, all of the young people I’ve worked with have taught me so much more about the world, and about my own values, than my many years in school did. It’s meant so much to me to hear and read your stories, and understand your viewpoints of the world.

But today I’d like to do something I’ve never done at The Beat, ever. I’d like to share my opinions and thoughts with all of you, after being a listener and observer for so long.

The 15.23 issue of The Beat is not only meaningful to me because it’s the last issue I’ll be a part of (at least for a while), but also because one of the topics is near and dear to my heart. One of the topics this week is about gender roles, which basically means what males and females are supposed to do, or not do, because of their gender. When I facilitated this topic, I heard a lot of the same answers – men should not go into any sort of beauty career (hair, nails, etc.) because it’s too feminine, and women should not go into any dangerous or heavy labor careers (police, military, construction, etc.) because they’re usually not strong enough. I also heard a lot of people say that women are pure emotion, and men are not emotional at all. It’s not only a few people who said this, it was the majority of the young people I talked to, and it seemed like everyone felt this was general knowledge. I have some problems with this train of thought, and I’d like to tell you all why.

I’ve always been the type of person to question everything. I don’t believe what people tell me unless they can back it up with some kind of proof, or until I figure out the truth myself. So my first instinct is to question what many of you believe about gender roles. What proof is there that females are more emotional than males or that they can’t handle as much stress? I would argue that they just express the emotions they have more openly because American culture allows them to, while males are taught from a young age that they should hide emotions or feelings of stress at all cost. They’re not born any particular way, but instead society teaches them to conform to gender roles that are completely made up. I could go one step further and argue that the reason these roles were made up in the first place was to oppress women so men could stay in power many, many years ago, but let’s not go there today.

But the truth is, gender roles are something that science shows to be, for the most part, in our heads. Women are not naturally more emotional, and men are not naturally more able to handle stress. Some things are biological, like how males have taller heights on average, but the idea of males and females being born with personality differences is completely bogus. And there is science behind this to prove it. So I am here to tell all of you (especially all you ladies out there) that you are just as capable as anyone else to take on any role you want, whether it be police officer, make-up artist, or primary caretaker/parent. It’s not natural for girls to be feminine and boys to be masculine. You are taught to act a certain way by parents, school, TV/movies, commercials, and companies that want to sell you things. People who tell you that you should “act like a lady” or “be a man” are just conforming to the system.

But here’s the good part –you don’t have to conform, you have a choice. You can choose to act like the system tells you to, or you can choose to act the way you really want to. The only thing holding you back is being self-conscious about what other people might think, or wanting to hold on to habits that you’ve kept your whole life. Therefore, I challenge all of you to step outside of your box and show your emotions or be athletic or dress the way you want to regardless of how other people, or even yourselves might judge. I also challenge you to let others be who they want to be without judging them or putting them down for just being who they are. If everyone stopped conforming to systemized gender roles, and also stopped judging others for doing so, the world would be a much more peaceful (and happy) place.

And with that challenge I say farewell for now to The Beat Within. I’m off to New York City for school and new adventures. It’s been a wonderful experience and I hope it has been positive for all of you as well. Keep writing!

Thanks Julia, for all the help you gave and for this powerful argument for equality between the sexes.

The topics addressed in this issue are , “Feeling guilty” – Are you feeling guilty about anything? We’re not talking about being legally guilty or innocent. We’re talking about that feeling we get when we do something that we almost immediately regret doing, and then feel it hanging around in our mind long after it’s done. It could be something we said to our mother when we were angry and wished we hadn’t. It could be not taking care of our responsibilities to a child or someone else who depends on us. It could be something we did to someone, knowing it was the wrong thing to do. It could be letting down someone we love. If you’re feeling guilty about anything, tell The Beat what happened, and how you deal with the guilt.

The second topic, “Feeling good about helping” – We know how it makes you feel to be judged only by the “bad” things you’ve done, only by your “crimes” and mistakes. So take this opportunity to tell us about the good things you do, and how it makes you feel when you do them. Many good deeds go unnoticed and unrewarded, so take some time to pat yourself on the back for the good you’ve done. Give us specific examples of when you helped someone or did something for someone that you’re proud of. Don’t forget the details.

Lastly, “The most memorable Bar-B-Q” – This past weekend was the three-day holiday for Memorial Day. Even though that is a day set aside to remember those who have died in war, it’s also a day when we traditionally go to the park, the beach or the back yard and bar-b-q for family and friends. The Beat wants you to think back to the most

memorable bar-b-q you ever attended, and tell us as much about it as you can remember. What did you eat? Who did the cooking? Who was there? What made it the one you will always remember?

All right, this issue goes out to Julia. Thank you for believing in this work. It has been a pleasure working with you. We at The Beat Within truly hope we meet again.